The profound silence of the Israeli night, usually a comforting blanket after a day of spiritual exploration, was suddenly, violently torn apart. What began as an unsettling murmur quickly escalated into a cacophony of thuds, shouts, and the undeniable sound of heavy boots charging down the hallway directly outside my door. My heart, typically calm, began to pound a frantic rhythm against my ribs, echoing in my ears with terrifying intensity. A chilling question sliced through the quiet terror of my mind: Were we under attack?
Just months prior, my family and I had embarked on a deeply meaningful journey to Israel, accompanying revered religious leaders from our church. This pilgrimage, intended to be a time of reflection and spiritual growth, had taken an unexpected and perilous turn. Trapped in the darkened hotel room, I held my breath, slowly turning my head to gauge the reactions of my two daughters. Were they, too, awake, their young minds grappling with the same primal fear that was now gripping me?
Amidst Chaos, an Unexpected Calm
With mouths slightly agape and the covers tucked securely under their chins, my two precious daughters remained blissfully lost in slumber. Their innocent faces, illuminated by the faint ambient light filtering through the curtains, offered a stark contrast to the escalating chaos just beyond our door. Here I was, a mother in a foreign land, convinced our hotel in Israel was under siege, yet my children slept soundly, oblivious to the perceived danger. Or, at least, that’s what the terrifying sounds suggested.
Our journey through Jordan, Israel, and the borders of neighboring countries had necessitated a nightly separation for Cade and me. For two weeks, due to the lack of hotel rooms large enough for our family of five, the boys slept in one room, and the girls in another. This arrangement, usually a minor inconvenience, now felt like a grave vulnerability. I felt an overwhelming weight of responsibility for my daughters’ safety, a burden that solidified into a paralyzing fear. I was frozen, confused, yet amidst the turmoil, a strange, almost unsettling sense of “okayness” began to settle over me.
It wasn’t a profound sense of peace in the conventional understanding of the word, but rather an inexplicable calm that coexisted with the fear. As the unsettling noises outside our room ebbed and flowed for what felt like an eternity, I found myself clinging to this quiet steadfastness. Every instinct screamed at me to check on Cade, to peer down the ominous hallway, but a greater caution prevailed. What if “they” were out there? Three girls, alone but together, would present an obvious and defenseless target. The thought chilled me to the bone, cementing my decision to remain safely within the confines of our room.
My attempts to text Cade were futile, each message stubbornly refusing to send, adding another layer of isolation to the already tense situation. Then, a deafening explosion ripped through the night air, shaking the very foundations of the hotel and rattling my resolve. My eyes instinctively glued to the ceiling, I closed them tight and silently, desperately, prayed. I prayed for safety, for protection, for an end to the terrifying ordeal. That night, time seemed to stretch infinitely, each minute a heavy burden of uncertainty and fear, punctuated by the chilling sounds of an unseen conflict.
Silent Guardians and Unseen Battles
The dawn, when it finally broke, brought with it a fragile sense of relief, but also a new wave of revelation. As our entire tour group gathered the next morning, exhausted but safe, stories began to emerge, each one adding a piece to the night’s perplexing puzzle. Tales of unanswered phone calls to the front desk, of staff seemingly having abandoned their posts, leaving bewildered guests — all foreign, many not speaking the local language — to navigate the terrifying night alone. The feeling of vulnerability was palpable, a shared experience etched onto every face.
But it was Cade’s account that painted the most vivid and harrowing picture. Unbeknownst to me, while I was frozen in fear and prayer, he had a front-row seat to the unfolding drama. Throughout the long, anxious hours, he remained awake, alert, and resolute. Cautiously, he would slip his camera between the curtains, capturing fleeting images and video footage of the unfolding events outside. He waited, listened, and stood guard at the windows and hallways, a silent sentinel watching over not just his family, but everyone else in their rooms, unaware of the unseen protector.
Little did I know, the terror that had filled our hotel was not an internal breach, but a dramatic confrontation unfolding on the road just outside. It was a barricade, a late-night surprise attack that escalated into a devastating sequence of events: an explosion that had reverberated through our walls, a prolonged gunfight, and the ominous appearance of armored vehicles. Cade’s quiet vigilance, his preparedness, and his courage were not just commendable; they were an embodiment of unwavering protection in the face of grave danger. His actions that night provided a shield, both literal and metaphorical, allowing us a measure of safety we hadn’t realized was being actively defended.
Reflections on Fear and Finding Solace
That one fearful night in Israel remains a vivid, unsettling memory. I will never truly know the full scope of what transpired, if lives were lost, or the long-term impact on those caught in the crossfire. However, the profound hurt I carry is born from the knowledge that my single night of terror, while deeply impactful for me, pales in devastating comparison to the unimaginable hardships and enduring conflicts that many in that region face every single day. Their reality is a constant struggle, a continuous battle for peace and stability, a stark contrast to my fleeting encounter with fear.
It was not only Cade who exemplified such unwavering devotion. That same night, another man, a respected leader within our church group, also walked the halls, watched, prayed, and stood ready to protect those under his care. These men, separated by distance but united in purpose, became the quiet pillars of strength in a world that had suddenly felt utterly unpredictable. Their actions underscored a profound truth that transcended the immediate danger.
The complexities of global events, the ceaseless conflicts and incomprehensible suffering that plague our world, often leave me bewildered. I do not claim to understand the intricate political and social machinations that drive such turmoil. Yet, from that terrifying night, I grasped a fundamental, undeniable understanding: In the very heart of danger, there exist individuals — men and women of integrity and conviction — whom one can trust, whose guidance can be sought, and who will stand as a bulwark between us and the encroaching darkness. Seeking truth, and aligning oneself with those who lead with honesty and compassion, may not erase the possibility of danger, but it undoubtedly provides an invaluable source of guidance, an anchor for peace, and, yes, even a profound sense of protection when the world around us seems to unravel.
The Urgent Call for Peacemakers
In the entirety of human history, the need for individuals willing to stand upon watchtowers, to illuminate abandoned halls with hope, and to actively foster understanding has never been more critical. My heart has been utterly shattered to witness the sacred lands I recently explored, discovered, and grew to deeply love, tragically consumed by the flames of war. It is an injustice beyond words, a reality that feels profoundly wrong and unfair. Yet, it is crucial to recognize that this is not merely an issue of “them” versus “us”; it is a challenge that implicates and affects us all. We are collectively yearning for solace, in desperate need of fervent prayers, a return to the principles embodied by Christ, and, perhaps most importantly, we need each other to navigate these turbulent times.
If you find yourself confused tonight, perhaps lying awake, staring up at your ceiling, your mind wrestling with the unsettling question of what truly is happening “out there” in the world, may I humbly offer you the profound peace that I, a flawed individual, found myself clinging to amidst my own fear?
Allow yourself to envision this comforting truth:
- Christ walks our halls, not just the corridors of ancient hotels, but the pathways of our lives, our homes, and our hearts.
- He stands at the windows, observing, understanding, and ever-present through every trial and triumph.
- He extends His grace individually to those both inside and outside His dwelling place, because in His divine love, we are all His cherished creations, deserving of His boundless compassion and unwavering protection.
I earnestly invite you to explore the inspiring message of “Peacemakers Needed” shared by @russellmnelson. Let us all, with hearts united, gather in solemn prayer for those who are currently enduring far greater suffering and hardship than my single night of fear could ever encompass. Their resilience in the face of continuous struggle calls for our collective empathy and spiritual support. As we reflect on our shared humanity and the profound need for understanding and reconciliation, let us also commit to being active participants in building a more peaceful world, one prayer, one act of kindness, and one peacemaking effort at a time. The time for silent contemplation is over; the time for active peacemaking is now. #peacemakersneeded
